The Example Problem: Piracy

EA implemented an online authorization system on some of their games to combat piracy. I do not think anyone can blame a company being concerned about piracy if the piracy levels become too high. I do not think anyone can blame a company for attempting to stop piracy if the company begins to lose significant income from piracy. However, if the protection they implement frustrates customers to the point of not wanting to purchase your products, this is when company owners should listen to their customers and make a decision.

Same goes for bloggers or site owners if they make significant changes to their site. When a site owner unintentionally makes changes their audience does not like, the site owner should sit back for a minute and listen to their readers (as in be aware of their thoughts).

Note I said listen (be aware). I did not say implement.

The Important Decision: Choice

Let’s take a look at Seth’s article again because he makes an excellent distinguishing point:

The critics are never going to be happy with you, that’s why they’re critics. You might bore them by doing what they say… but that won’t turn them into fans, it will merely encourage them to go criticize someone else.

This is very true. Critics love to criticize. This is one of the reasons why, when I write a critical piece, I try to go back and revisit the situation to see if the situation I wrote about is the same. If things have changed, I update my readers and I will definitely shift from being “the critic” to “the fan”. A good example of that is my latest Wayne Sutton article.

The key here is to understand the difference between your critics and people who have legitimate points about things you might be doing wrong. Sometimes negative criticism is correct, which is why I make the difference between being aware and implementing.

Seth makes another good point: Ignore fans too.

Your fans don’t want you to change, your fans want you to maintain the essence of what you bring them but add a laundry list of features. You fans want lower prices and more contributions, bigger portions and more frequent deliveries.

If you think of your favorite companies or sites you can relate to this. You might want your favorite pizza place to lower prices, deliver faster, and add specific toppings to their offerings. These requests might actually cause the company to lose money but hey, you want it right?

So who do you listen to according to Seth? Sneezers.

You should listen to the people who tell the most people about you. Listen to the people who thrive on sharing your good works with others. If you delight these people, you grow.

Now let’s bring this back to EA – who did they “listen” to and how can you learn from their experience?

Negative Criticism Sometimes Means You Screwed Up

When EA released Spore last year, they sold over a million copies. The game was also on the top of the piracy charts. Could they have contributed to their own problem? Why should a customer legally purchase the game and frustrate themselves when an option is available to download the game and play in peace? EA even released a de-authorization tool to help ease their customers. The situation was that bad.

This is when a company owner, site owner, etc. should stop and listen…carefully. EA went too far, frustrated their customers and broke their trust. Looking at what everyone else was going through I opted not to play the game at all since I was happily playing World of Warcraft stress free. The critics were right in this case. The method EA implemented was not reasonable and they made their piracy situation worse.

Learning from their mistake, a Sims 3 online authorization will not be implemented. In business (and life) there will be mistakes. Learning from them is a key to success.

Tying it All Together

I think a company/site owner should be aware of what is being said about the company’s products and services. This does not mean the immediate reaction should be to bend over backwards and implement every suggestion because it is impossible to please everyone. However, in some cases “critics” can be right. In the age of mobility and high travel it is not unusual for people to have multiple installs of a game. For example, on a desktop and a laptop or the desktop at home and a desktop at work. Multiple installs does not necessarily equate to piracy anymore.

The key here is that even though EA added the online authorization it still did not stop piracy, it increased it. So why bother going down that path again? There is a difference between users wanting features that does not increase your profit or are not inline with your current goals (ignore those) and users complaining about being able to play the game they purchased (listen to those).

Your users and readers will let you know if you royally screwed up. Learn from the mistake and do not repeat it. I’m glad EA will not be implementing online authorization and because of that…I’m pre-ordering Sims 3.

And that is an example of a critic turning into a fan.

My significant other has artistic qualities so my half-painted three-toned bedroom grates on his last nerve. Not being able to stand it anymore he suggested we paint it. I tried to explain that, due to the size of the room, painting it is a challenge because there isn’t a place to put the furniture that is in the room. In the room there are:

• Two standard size beds pushed together.
• Three desks, one of them an extra large corner desk.
• A full size dresser (10 drawer) with a full size mirror.
• A matching chest.
• A matching make-up table.
• A sofa
• Entertainment center
• Various “things” around the edges of the room (like three monitors)

I can still ride a bike in the room. It’s not cluttered, just “filled”. Logically, one would think you could just push everything into the middle of the room but it is too much furniture, so it becomes a nightmare. I tried to explain this to him and I remembered the art of shutting up.

I dutifully went to Home Depot with him, picked up some paint (which I’m almost positive I have a similar color already but oh well), came back to the house, and watched his joy at finally being able to tackle my multi-colored room. One last time I tried to tell him about the furniture and he told me he had it all under control. Thinking I will become the master of shutting up, I asked if there was anything I could do? He said no, with such a satisfied smile on his face. I kissed him goodbye and went downstairs to cook.

And wait.

It didn’t take long. He came downstairs and I smiled. Eventually he said he understood what I meant. The pieces of furniture in that room are so large they can’t be put in another room. If you try to paint while keeping the furniture in the room it’s a pain of having to paint small sections, let it dry, and move big heavy pieces of furniture (for example, have to take the 10 drawers out of the dresser before moving because it’s a nice solid (big) dresser). Which he is going to do, but it is going to take much longer than he expected (and that is why the room is multi-colored to begin with). Then he realized he’s going to have to go back to Home Depot because there is a 2nd mural underneath four layers of wallpaper that need to be scraped (I had nothing to do with the mural or the wallpaper being on the walls but I bumped into that problem on another side of the room about 4 years earlier LOL).

My point is that he had to come to this realization on his own. I could have continued to try to explain it, to the point of perhaps arguing (because I knew I was right) but sometimes, it’s easier to let a person come into the knowledge at their own pace. In this case it was only an hour or so. For some things it can be months or years but realistically, some things cannot be rushed.

When I tell people about their blogs sometimes they can see where I am I coming from, sometimes they can’t. If I can’t properly navigate around their site that’s a problem, one that can be easily fixed. It’s up to them to step out of the “I love my blog” zone and see how a reader would be going through their site. If their multi-colored site is blinding to the eye, again…it’s great they like it but how would a reader feel about it? I’m not saying one should sacrifice what they like or enjoy on their blog BUT don’t complain about not having traffic. For every action there is a consequence. If someone brings up constructive criticism about your blog/project, look at it realistically. And for the person giving the criticism realize the person has to make their own decisions in their own time.

And it makes the process easier knowing the art of shutting up.

What he didn’t expect was for me to think, “WTF! This mofo is going DOWN”, resume my body, heal real quick and destroy him. He “really” didn’t expect me to make it a point to kill him every time I saw him. And to tell my friends to destroy him on sight. That one cowardly (but brilliant) move cost him a lot of gold in repair bills (but hell, let’s admit it…one could say it was worth it because what he did was epic). See, if you’re going to receive honor from my death you have to earn it. One day I’ll lose interest and I won’t kill him on sight anymore (I only saw him twice since then…not sure about my friends but they kill Alliance on sight anyway).

One shouldn’t live in fear but one should take a moment to anticipate the reaction or repercussions of what one does.

Many people use their blogs, Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, etc. to rant, snark, and other wise express themselves. In many of those writings the writer is sharing an experience, talking about something he/she does or doesn’t like, telling someone off, disagreeing with someone, agreeing with someone only to have others disagree with their opinion…it comes in many flavors. Do you think about how the person or company you’re writing or talking about will take what you’ve said? If you say something behind someone’s back did you think about how he/she will take it if they found out what you said?

Going through sites for 9rules one of the things I look for is the ability to take criticism and how a person deals with confrontation. Most times it is impossible to tell unless the writer goes through it a lot but that doesn’t stop me from looking. It is easy to sit back with the “shield” of the internet and throw stones criticizing people, many times with no real basis (you know, like facts) to back up what was written. It is very easy to take a “persona” and try to detach yourself from the persona saying the things that could land one in hot water. The common thought process is that the person writing will never see the person being written about, so why not?

Think again.

With conferences, meet ups and most important social networks the ability to “bump into” the person being written about is much greater. A common past time on You Tube is for someone to put a video up complaining about something and asking his/her viewers to leave comments or contact the person he/she is talking about. Voice your opinion! That turns into an avalanche of criticism for the person that made the original video. Did you expect that?

Did you expect the person you talked about behind their back to find out about it?

Did you expect that your public enthusiasm for X could block your company for getting sponsorships from A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H and I because X is their competitor?

Did you expect your blog entry about skipping work to play Warcraft with your friend (which you put a picture of on your site) would get your friend fired?

Be careful what you say and how you say it yet be true to yourself.

What I find interesting about this is the control picture. The child’s picture was altered to look “ugly” and still everyone said the baby was cute. What interests me about this was there are numerous dodge phrases to use. Trust me there are, I use them.

• Oh isn’t he precious!
• You are so blessed to have this little bundle of joy…look at her!
• Your child reminds me of when my children were small.

Where there is a will there is a way. I can’t recall the parent asking me, when I didn’t say the child was cute, if their child was cute. Perhaps I need to come up with a phrase for that.

In an effort to spare someone pain (even strangers it seems) we tell those white lies in an act of kindness. Being generous here, there are times when telling those white lies are “okay” but there are times when a person prefers the truth. Don’t do what is easier for you (lie), tell them the truth.

A time like that is coming up for me. The next 9rules round (#7) begins August 6th. As I go through sites I have to be honest and objective. And unfortunately I’m the one that tells writers their blog didn’t make it. When time permits I try to tell them why (if they ask) because I think it is important to know the “why” and talk about it. For many who submit their site the feedback I gave them was the first objective criticism received. Even though it is tough I end up being glad I told the truth as I saw it.

That doesn’t mean you should tell someone their baby is ugly. You might get your butt whooped. Or if your girlfriend asks if those jeans makes her butt look big. Personally I’d say, “Yes, and you know this…why are you asking me?” and be in the doghouse but I can sympathize with the boyfriend that says, “No honey…”.

What I’m saying is that there is a time and a place for white lies (church seems to be one of them) and there is definitely a time to be mature and tell the truth.

Know the difference. Act accordingly.

The problem many entrepreneurs have is acknowledging there is a problem that needs to be resolved. This is particularly difficult if the site is a part of the echo chamber – a group of people who admire what you do and encourage you because they like you…not because you’re doing a good job. I realized there was a problem with the submission/acceptance process at 9rules and decided to fix it.

Part 1: Scrivs

If you remember previous rounds they were random, with perhaps a month or so lead time to submit during a 24 hour period. I always hated that. I mentioned it to Scrivs in the past but it was the 9rules style to hold submissions that way. You can imagine my surprise when Scrivs said that we should announce the dates in advance.

Once I realized he was serious, I jumped out of my chair and started dancing. I couldn’t help it. While he’s asking me how I wanted it handled I’m trying to dance and type at the same time. I said I wanted to have submissions once a quarter, he nailed the dates, and moved on to something else. I was spent from dancing and being so excited.

Why was this so important? It makes it very clear we are adding new members and for those that don’t agree with that, 9rules isn’t the place for them. There are a couple of other reasons I’ll get into shortly.

Part 2: The Quality of Submissions

I wanted to improve the quality of submissions. This round the quality was fantastic. We received a ton of submissions from new blogs that are awesome…but we require 6 months of consistent posting to be a member so they will be submitting next round. Anyway, 9rules is often mentioned as a place to go to get exposure for your site. The site mentioning 9rules rarely mentioned we require quality content. Getting submissions is fine but I hate telling people no. Especially large numbers of people.

Instead of writing the normal site tips I tried to get people to take a deeper look at their blogs. By announcing the rounds in advance it detracts from the need to get in “right now” and make the improvements they feel the need to make to improve their site. I encouraged people to take the time needed to improve their blogs even if it meant submitting in August.

Part 3: Going Through All Those Sites…

I wanted to educate people how we go through sites and what we look for. One way of doing this: we held a stream where we showed our reaction going through sites. Again, this is something the average site owner never sees. We spent an hour going through sites and a couple of hours having fun with our members and readers.

At a later date, Scrivs called for a meeting to go through sites, which we did on Skype. I set a date for the remaining part of the list (the bigger part) to be complete (in a very authoritative tone too). We then combined our results and I made the final decisions on acceptance.

Two weeks vs. two-three months. Yeah baby! Thanks guys because I know you guys were jammed with work! XOXOXOXOXO

Part 4: Feedback IS Important

The only way to improve is to know what was done wrong in the first place. This time I tried to address this in a more “blunt” manner. On the acceptance list I named the common reasons why blogs were rejected. Most people could view the list, realize their blog fit in one of those categories, and have closure. I made myself available to answer questions and it’s working out well. I couldn’t be happier.

Mission Accomplished: Now What?

I accomplished my goals and I’m ridiculously happy. Don’t mistake that for me being done. Many entrepreneurs slack once they reach a goal. Not this kid…I create a new goal! Since 9rules is a more mature company I love how “maturely” we handled the submission process. Thanks to the guys for helping me make Round 6 a kick-ass success.

Thanks to all of you for believing in us.

Because he had obvious problems with his plan. Obvious to me, that is.

Unfortunately, the powers that be didn’t give a damn about my prayers because he asked me what I thought. For a second I thought about lying but opted to go with honesty and I told him the truth: the way he explained his plans he had unrealistic goals that could not be accomplished. Let me be very clear: I told him he couldn’t do it the way he was talking about doing it.

Then I waited it for it…the ego kicking in. Me, having the audacity to tell him that he couldn’t do something. Yeah yeah, blah blah.

This time I was pleasantly surprised.

Him: Hmmm…you brought up some points I was unaware of. How would you suggest I proceed? Do you think I should just stop or with a new plan I can be reasonably successful?
Me: Huh? (my friends were dumb-founded as well)
Him: I’m going to have to research more. What if you are right? It’s to my benefit to have a better plan. I have nothing to lose having a more solid plan.
Me: (I was thinking, “Ok, where are the cameras?” and I started scanning the room for them while he spoke.
Him: I want to do this and I expect it will be hard work. Two heads are better than one and you have more business experience than I do. I’m sure, if you are willing of course, we could come up with a better plan than I had.

This man went from being a guy I wouldn’t look twice at to being the sexiest man on the planet at that moment. Not because he said I’m da bomb or anything like that. He thinks smart. He basically said the risk of me being right was too great to ignore, so why not plan for it?

Twenty minutes talking back and forth he was smiling like a Cheshire cat because he found a couple of other things he didn’t mention and had not thought of and made note to better plan for those things. The conversation started with a weak plan, turned into “you can’t do it that way” but ended up with a more solid business approach.

I know he wasn’t trying to gain my respect but he got it. I love to see someone enthusiastic about what they are doing but I also love to see people acknowledge new ideas – at least have an open mind about them (I learn from people daily because no one knows everything). He admitted that, due to his lack of business knowledge, he would have tanked because he was missing some very clear issues. The truth, that is what way it should be. Many people decide they want to start a commercial venture (ie: make money from it) but have zero business experience. And expect that to work. Unfortunately with the barrier to entry being low on the internet, there are tons of internet businesses that fail each year. How many people have these skills – the ones needed to thrive and sustain a business?

The ability to budget.
The ability to complete projects on time.
The ability to plan projects efficiently.
The ability to read financial statements.

Negotiate. Control. Monetize. Communicate. Co-ordinate. Interact. Advise. Prioritize. Organize. Manage. Lead. Inspire.

AND have the skills needed to make, create or implement the product or service he or she is interested in?

Most don’t, and they don’t have the money to get the people they need. The venture fails.

When I express my thoughts I express them with facts. I’m not the person to disagree and state a weak-ass argument with an opinion like, “Because I think you should”. I’m going to tell you point by point why I pick one approach over the other. Pros and cons, strengths and weaknesses.

The gentleman last night opened his mind and accepted the negative criticism for what it was, and turned negatives into positives. If you are a person that doesn’t do that naturally, on the real, perhaps your attention would be served anywhere else than trying to be an entrepreneur.

Simple question, is it not? When I ask this question I receive the usual responses:

• Blogging seems like fun.
• Share experiences or therapeutic reasons.
• My friends were doing it, so I thought I would try it.
• I want to show of my skill or professionalism in X area.
• I want to make money online.
• The desire to meet new people.
• I want to live a secret life (escape life).

Blogging can be a different experience for everyone. There is one thing that puzzles me. Why do people believe that no one has an interest in what they do or say? Is that a paradox? People blog to share their thoughts publicly, hoping someone will read it (not necessarily a lot of people). Many want to be popular or successful online, yet have a hard time believing anyone would have an interest in what they do or say. If you are one of those people, do not feel bad because you are not alone. I read an article today where Zac Efron could not believe the paparazzi have an interest in him:

“I had no idea that anyone could ever care. That happens to, like, big stars. I woke up and my dad told me that I was in a newspaper on the beach”"he made fun of me, he said I was “˜frollicking.’”

One does not have to have fame to be interesting. Do not forget the truly famous start of with a small audience. Most people start at zero and work their way up through levels of success. Let’s look at the smaller scale of how people seek out people they are interested in:

• Ever looked up someone on MySpace that you have not seen in a while, found the person, then browsed their pictures, videos, comments, etc.? Did you share what you learned with others?
• Have you found a writer you liked and looked for other sites the writer might have?
• Do you read personal blogs where the writer talks about someone anonymously and you have an interest in what the anonymous person does or says?
• Do you follow gossip online? Geek? Celebrity? Startup? The type does not matter because one is not better than the other.
• If you said yes to #4, have you ever written about what you found? Did you check out the facts to confirm it was true?
• Have you ever subscribed to a Twitter feed of someone you have never met and never talked to on the phone?

I think I proved my point. We have interest in people the general public has never heard of and if you have a site or a social profile anywhere with friends, there are people that are interested in you. Those are the people you know of. Most are quietly interested, which is why it can be easy to forget they are there. An example, the guys and I did a super stream last Friday. On each stream the number of viewers is displayed. I was not surprised to receive an email informing me of a tip to resolve my wide-angle camera/lighting problem and the person said approximately 30-40 people watched the majority of the time because the stream was being watched in a company’s break room. You think those people (not a static 30-40 people mind you) had an opinion about what they saw? Do you think they voiced their opinion? If they did not, does that stop them from sharing their thoughts at another time, to different people? They might blog about it. Talk to their spouse about it. Tell their best friend about our stream and the impression the three of us made on him/her. A similar example, I mentioned Seesmic a couple of times to Scrivs (in the 3by9 podcast), and he checked out their videos. Does Loic know? Highly unlikely even though I spoke of it publicly.

What is the point here? If you publish something online you want people to be interested in you. Perhaps you only want 100 versus 1M people due to the additional pressures being under a spotlight that big brings but 100 people is more than the average person has. To someone not active online 100 strangers following you are a lot of people. Whether it is one person or 500,000 people, it is up to you to be able to handle the praise and criticisms that come with being recognizable (and you ARE recognizable if you publish content online to someone). The more people interested in you, the less room you have for saying something stupid, not checking your facts, acting unprofessional in a professional environment, etc. To conclude, below is a very smooth response from Zac as a guide for one approach to handling negative criticism:

Even when I bring up notorious “Queen of Mean” gossip blogger Perez Hilton, who is obsessed with insinuating that Efron-whom he’s nicknamed “Zacquisha”-is gay, Efron’s response is almost surreally nice: “I know it’s very addictive to read that kind of stuff. It’s entertainment. Perez has obviously struck a chord in the public eye. He’s doing something right. That deserves admiration-I think he does a great job. Um-” He pauses for a moment, then adds, “Honestly, if the worst he can say about me is that I’m gay, then I think I’ll be fine. I can handle it.”

1. I loved your response. You should speak up more, kudos! [Response was fine as it was]
2. I wouldn’t have said anything at all. [I shouldn't have said anything]
3. Lose the sarcasm. I expected more of you. [Assumed an emotion I wasn't feeling]
4. I think you should have dug deeper in the situation, even if it got ugly. [I should have done more]

Completely conflicting expectations. Getting them almost back to back made it real clear what I deal with everyday. This is a list of some of the expectations/critiques I receive online:

1. How I should run the business.
2. What features the business should have.
3. The direction the business should go in.
4. Specific instructions on how things should be handled.
5. What I can talk about.
6. How I can talk about it.
7. Where I can talk about it.
8. What my words mean.
9. The emotions behind my words.
10. The true intent of my words.

Let’s look at this a minute. Tom, founder of MySpace is lying on his profile about his age, when asked about it doesn’t comment, and there was a discussion about whether it was “news” or not because it is considered that insignificant. I write something that isn’t that big of a deal (like a response to a note) and people have expectations on what I said, how I said it, what I should have said, etc. Read the comments on his profile. Love and praise but no one is saying, “You shouldn’t lie, you’re better than that” or “You added new features but didn’t stop the people from having ugly ass pages. Why Tom, why?”. Maybe he is getting these and it’s just not public but publicly the majority don’t care. If I lied about my age or what I ate for breakfast, wow, I’d never hear the end of it.

So what’s the difference? What am I doing that is causing this higher plateau of expectation that a founder of a billion dollar business doesn’t have? The irony is, a Mike Arrington quote made me realize what I was doing wrong:

Velioncho, reader comments, links and emails certainly impact what we write about. But I still tend to write what I feel is interesting as opposed to taking the path of least resistance. If I stopped doing that this job wouldn’t be much fun anymore. The exit door is a click away – stay if you like, leave if you don’t

On a business side I know some decisions will not be popular and I have that attitude. Mike, Scrivs and I share 9rules and it’s our company but when we respond to people in Notes we are usually giving person opinions – something that doesn’t normally happen in the traditional work setting. When I write here I express my personal thoughts but it stopped being fun because I was jumping through hoops for people I never met and didn’t know me. I keep saying don’t do that but it’s easy to do to avoid the drama. When it gets to the point I’m writing to make others happy there is something wrong.

I wasn’t following my own advice. I am now.

I booked a trip (that I’m not supposed to take yet) because I need to decompress a bit. I’ve been making other people happy for so long I need to find what makes me happy. Combine that with me not being able to do anything because I was recuperating…it’s surprising I haven’t gone insane.

Haha, perhaps I did. I know one thing. Yesterday I cared (slightly in principle) Tom was lying. Today I don’t care. The reason why people express their opinions? They care – and I’m lucky to have that. When people are quiet – that’s when they don’t care or don’t care enough to extend the effort to be vocal about it. I have to remember to be aware of the what is being said and listen to it, but not let it rule me.

I have to be me. If someone doesn’t like me, it’s up to them to leave not for me to change.

Remember that in your own lives, particularly if you want success. Success breeds criticism.

Your gut instinct might be to delete the comment, simply rid your site of the nuisance. Some might even view it as therapeutic. Deleting the comment basically says “I win!” to the commenter. Or you might want to tell that rogue commenter off, put the sucker in his/her place for daring to show such a lack of disrespect on your site.

Then you realize you call yourself an adult and it is time for you to act like one.

No matter what you write, people are going to disagree with you. Even if the entry is about your personal life, you had spaghetti for dinner. Someone in the world hates spaghetti and will think you should have had chicken instead. It is impossible to please everyone. When things aren’t fits and giggles on your site, it’s time to drop your emotions and look at things objectively. Yes, the female of the 9rules Triad^TM is said: be objective.

At my.9rules this topic came up: what to do with misinformed comments? The original poster said:

I am fine with dissenting opinions, of course. It just seems counterproductive when the dissenting opinion isn’t just another way of looking at it, but an attack on my knowledge and skillset.

It just seems to be that “nice article, but I think you’re wrong about ______” is more productive than “you don’t know anything at all, you are clearly completely off-base with ______.”

If someone saying you’re off-base bothers you, close comments, pack up the blog, save yourself the headache. I’m serious…if you can’t take a comment like that you’re not ready for strangers to comment on what you write. I could see if the person said, “You don’t know what you’re talking about, you’re clearly ignorant on this topic” and said nothing else. That is not how 99.9% of these comments go. The person says, “OMG, what are you saying!?!” then proceeds to inform why they think the writer is 100% wrong. Sometimes they are right, sometimes they are wrong, most times it is a situation where there is no right or wrong…simply a difference of opinion. Most of the times the writer is feeling the sting of being told they are not knowledgeable and they do not want that opinion spread on the internet, especially on their site.

Ego tends to get people in trouble and that is why I encourage objectivity in situations like these.

You want to avoid a “you don’t know what you are talking about” comment, back up your entries with facts. That changes the conversation from accusations to a debate, somewhat forcing the opposing position to come forth with some facts to prove you wrong (or prove their point).

As a writer it is up to you to clearly define your point, facts and all.

Your gut instinct might be to delete the comment, simply rid your site of the nuisance. Some might even view it as therapeutic. Deleting the comment basically says “I win!” to the commenter. Or you might want to tell that rogue commenter off, put the sucker in his/her place for daring to show such a lack of disrespect on your site.

Then you realize you call yourself an adult and it is time for you to act like one.

No matter what you write, people are going to disagree with you. Even if the entry is about your personal life, you had spaghetti for dinner. Someone in the world hates spaghetti and will think you should have had chicken instead. It is impossible to please everyone. When things aren’t fits and giggles on your site, it’s time to drop your emotions and look at things objectively. Yes, the female of the 9rules Triad^TM is said: be objective.

At my.9rules this topic came up: what to do with misinformed comments? The original poster said:

I am fine with dissenting opinions, of course. It just seems counterproductive when the dissenting opinion isn’t just another way of looking at it, but an attack on my knowledge and skillset.

It just seems to be that “nice article, but I think you’re wrong about ______” is more productive than “you don’t know anything at all, you are clearly completely off-base with ______.”

If someone saying you’re off-base bothers you, close comments, pack up the blog, save yourself the headache. I’m serious…if you can’t take a comment like that you’re not ready for strangers to comment on what you write. I could see if the person said, “You don’t know what you’re talking about, you’re clearly ignorant on this topic” and said nothing else. That is not how 99.9% of these comments go. The person says, “OMG, what are you saying!?!” then proceeds to inform why they think the writer is 100% wrong. Sometimes they are right, sometimes they are wrong, most times it is a situation where there is no right or wrong…simply a difference of opinion. Most of the times the writer is feeling the sting of being told they are not knowledgeable and they do not want that opinion spread on the internet, especially on their site.

Ego tends to get people in trouble and that is why I encourage objectivity in situations like these.

You want to avoid a “you don’t know what you are talking about” comment, back up your entries with facts. That changes the conversation from accusations to a debate, somewhat forcing the opposing position to come forth with some facts to prove you wrong (or prove their point).

As a writer it is up to you to clearly define your point, facts and all.